Re-write Your History to Shape the Future You Desire!

Have you become a victim to your past? Decided you’re unlovable, unworthy, or less than because of the meaning you’ve assigned to the experiences you’ve had?  Life happens, events occur – we see things, exchange words, experience feelings and then we use our interpretation of what we’ve experienced to assign meaning to it all. Have you ever noticed that a number of people can participate in the same event, yet each person will have their own unique experience of it?  My partner and I can watch the same movie, see the same scenes and hear the same words yet we don’t always react the same to it. He’ll laugh when I cry and often one of us ends up enjoying the movie more than the other.

 

This is exactly what we do in our lives – we assign meaning to the events we experience, based on how we’ve interpreted it at the time. The meaning then becomes our memory of the event, having a natural influence on the flow of our lives. Our past remains intertwined with us, affecting how we engage in shaping our present and future. When a memory surfaces, the emotional tone from its prior meaning influences our current creation – it becomes part of the mix.

 

“The only meaning that anything has is the meaning we give it.”  A Course in Miracles

 

If the meaning attached to your past hinders your present efforts, change it! Sounds simple, but not always. Not when our self-assigned meaning safeguards us or elevates us artificially by diminishing others. Such empowerment often derives from a limiting source – a source that takes from others, diminishing their value. 

 

Limiting thoughts feed off external energy. Thoughts like “I’m better, smarter, more attractive, more creative…” puff us up while putting others down. Or “I’m not as good, smart, pretty, tall,  thin, creative…” deflate oneself while elevating others, keeping oneself safe (yet small).

 

Then there’s the endless source of potential and possibility available to all, harming none! Empowering thoughts sound like “I can achieve this,” “I am sufficient,” “I am evolving,” or “what’s possible now?” Notice the focus on self – acknowledging, accepting, and motivating oneself. When we don’t include others in our meaning, we neither inflate nor deflate them; the meaning centers on YOU. Others will create their meaning for shared events, focusing on themselves. As tempting as it is to internalize another’s meaning – it’s vital to remember it’s not about you.

 

 

We can’t change the past’s ‘facts’; we must accept them. Yet, we can reshape the meaning or story we’ve woven around our past. By doing so, we alter the past’s influence on our present and future.

 

Consider the experience of a layoff due to restructuring – many of us have encountered this. The feeling of being laid off doesn’t usually feel great – even when it’s what we’ve secretly (or not so secretly) been wishing for. The experience of being asked to leave the building or of being escorted off the premises can sting. Often, people craft narratives like “I wasn’t valued, someone plotted against me, I’m flawed” – these meanings lead to rejection, a disempowering state to be in when seeking new employment.

 

In such cases, we must disentangle fact from fiction. This happened in 2003; I was laid off from my banking job. Even though I recognized my role, in that I was already working towards a new career, it stung! I told myself a whole much of stories that I needed to later retract. The FACTS were that I was no longer employed. I’d been laid off without wrongdoing – it served me to believe that.  This was no longer my desired career path, and I was moving towards another. Those were the facts.  The story that empowered me: I needed to be released to focus on my desired career. A door closed; it was time to walk through the other that had opened.  Attaching this story feels empowering. A bit scary, but in an exciting way.

 

Changing the meaning of the past doesn’t erase experience of it. For a long time when I recalled hearing the words and being escorted out of the branch, a slight sting remained. The trigger is a reminder to of my power to “choose” the story I remember next… guess which one I chose?

Humans are creatures of habit; choosing an empowering meaning and reinforcing a new story can take time. Be gentle as you train your mind to source potential and possibility while giving meaning to life’s events.

 

Re-write the meaning of your past and become the hero/heroine of your own life’s journey.